Nutcracker Memories

My roommate and I, my 1st year at Rock, with our "tree."

Sigh. As so many friends finish up Nutcracker seasons this week, I'm thinking back to all my (millions of) Nutcracker memories. Because of my stupid foot, this is the first winter in 15 years that I have danced in some version of the holiday classic. I grew up on it. It's what Christmas means to me. And it's really hard to have the season come without putting on a pair of pointe shoes...

I was very fortunate this season to still be involved in a production, even if I wasn't onstage. Since September I've been rehearsal assistant for Exit 12 Dance Company's brand new Nutcracker, which had its run this past weekend in West Hartford, CT. While it was frustrating to not get up and dance in rehearsals, I really enjoyed helping shape the choreography and clean up details. I was so thankful to still be part of the creative process in the studio, and for me it was a different but equally beneficial kind of learning process on the outside.

I went to see the finished product on Friday and was so proud to see my friends onstage :) Everyone looked beautiful and came a long way.

But at the same time, as I sat in the front row my heart was breaking. I want to dance. I want to be onstage. I want to be in Nutcracker. I miss it terribly...

While my foot still rests and gets stronger (and the pain hopefully goes away soon?) I'm trying as hard as I can to stay connected to ballet. But it's not the same when you just can't do it all day everyday, with performances this festive time of year. Here's a look back at some fun Nutcracker memories...

My first Nutcracker - as a Chinese Doll with Boston Ballet, age 7

Our cast of dolls

As a lamb in Boston's Nut. During Marzipan they had 4 of us hopping around stage.

As a pollichinelle in Boston. I was so proud: I got to be "Kissy Boy" at the end, staying onstage for an extra few seconds blowing kisses to the audience by myself :)

I was a party girl twice in Boston. This was the older year. Check out how long those curls are!

An angel in Boston. So...the audition people lost my # and didn't cast me, so last minute they made me the only thing they could: an angel with people twice my age (and height). Not a great year for a shorty under the smog.

My last year in Boston I was Tea. The parasols were fun.

After Boston I spent 2 years as a Hoop in Balanchine's Nutcracker at Pennsylvania Ballet. Nice pants.

After that came NYC: 2 years in Dances Patrelle's Nutcracker. This was snow.

A not-so-Spanish Spanish cast, Dances Patrelle.

After that? My first Nutcracker as a PROFESSIONAL. Albano Ballet in CT.

Albano Ballet bows.

And then: 2 years of my favorite. Ballerina bears at Radio City Music Hall. Ah.

And now...you can see me all too seriously watching Roman Baca's Nutcracker rehearsal, here.

Happy Nutcrackering! Happy Radio City-ing! Happy Holidays :)

New! Boston Int'l Ballet Competition

If I've recovered into better than top form in time, I would LOVE to enter this...

It's founded by fierce competition coach (and former NYCB and Bolshoi principal) Valentina Kozlova. Over the years I've seen and danced with some of her students and...wow. They are crazy good. I bet this competition will be full of fierce little bunheads. Might be worth just watching anyways...

It's scheduled to be held May 12, 13, and 15, 2011 in John Hancock Hall in Boston. Judges include (the super sweet) Violette Verdy, Andris Liepa, Hae Shik Kim, and Septime Webre with Boston Ballet Artistic Director Mikko Nissinen.

Boston struggles...again

"Boston Ballet to Cut Nearly 20% of Dancers in Company"

In seeing this article in the Times today, I was reminded of my days at Boston Ballet School and was saddened to hear that they have to cut back...and on dancers, of all things! The company has faced many issues while I was there in the school (til '04) and since then, but just the sound of laying off 11 dancers is horrible!

Dancers barely get paid decently in most ballet companies, but from what I had heard Boston seemed to be one of the better ones in terms of taking care of their dancers, even offering full health and dental benefits and show allowance to their SECOND company BBII. Few companies to my knowledge can afford to treat their apprentices that well, nevermind the company. So to hear that 11 company members won't have their contracts renewed because of debt and financial problems is awful.

The news also comes with the announcement that their executive director is leaving to "explore a number of exciting opportunities in the nonprofit world,” according to her quote in the Times. I found this interesting also after reading Danciti's post about the struggle to keep good executive directors in dance (post links to an upcoming panel hosted by Dance/NYC about this probelm). Apparently Artistic Director Mikko Nissinen will be wearing both hats of artistic and executive director until they find a replacement, but won't that create even more challenges?

Oh the trials and tribulations of non-profits. During y rehearsal this morning our director was speaking of a board meeting they had recently where they laughed about the fact that almost any problem could be solved with more money. It's sad that the arts are not well funded today. Sigh.

nostalgic amusement

Yesterday in my procrastination efforts (haha) I went through some (really) old writing I had stashed away in old files on my computer, and I came across this hilarious poem (is it a poem?) that I wrote years and years ago...it's basically all amusing things that were overheard backstage at Nutcracker in Boston. Mind you I was no fabulous writer back in the day (I think I was like 11 when I did this?) and it's nothing fancy, and might not even have any meaning unless you were there...but I had to post it. It's hilarious to me...I think if you've ever been backstage in that kind of professional environment you may relate to some of these phrases...and if not, don't ask! Haha.

Curtain Call

Good evening ladies and gentlemen, this is your half hour call, half hour!
Clara to wardrobe!
When can we rehearse?
Can I borrow some hairspray?
Quiet downstairs!

Fifteen minute call, fifteen minutes to the top of Act I.
Are my curls ok?
The vending machine broke again!
Where’s Dew Drop?
It’s so hot in here!

Ten minute call everyone, 10 minutes.
Chorus to the studio for warmup!
Anyone have some bobby pins?
Warning on fog…
Stop screaming about the cockroaches!
Not talking in the pit.

Five minute call please, onstage at five minutes!
Light 346...go!
Orchestra to the pit.
You’re going up, Paul.
Meatball, can we have footlights?
Places please!

And curtain…
GO!
---

Ok, rereading it again now, I KNOW some of this doesn't make sense. 'You're going up Paul' is funny because it's when they would raise Drosselmyer up so he could 'fly' in for Act II. Meatball was a nickname for a stagehand.

Oh there are so many memories...someday I'll write them so they actually make sense! Haha.

blast from the past, and super tired

Today was extreeeemely ballet heavy. Unexpectedly, I ended up having an hour and a half of private lesson after class to work on my variation for a little student showcase coming up at the end of the month. I hadn't been planning these rehearsals but there happened to be empty studios after both morning and night classes today, so we worked a LOT even though I was super exhausted from class (and my foot is bothering me again...).

I'm excited for our little showcase though. It's going to be February 24 at 5:30pm if anyone is interested. Pop me an email and I'll give you the location...all are welcome! It's only $5 at the door and should be a quick but fun program.

Besides that, the highlight of my night was just getting delayed email notifications of some comments on The Winger. For whatever reason, the WordPress software didn't email me when people left comments on my posts weeks ago, and only tonight did they bother to come through my inbox.

Well, I was greatly surprised and excited to find a congratulatory comment from an old teacher I had a LOOOOOOOOOOONG time ago in Boston. Years and years ago, and she was never actually one of my main teachers but rather a head of the studio kind of thing. But apparently she had been keeping up with my posts on the Winger and wished me congratulations for graduating, etc. How wonderful it was to hear from her and to see that people really do read this stuff we post about!

I know usually I'm complaining about it, but I really do love the fact that the dance world is so small.

If anyone else out there from the past is reading this feel free to comment and keep in touch! I love love love hearing from people I miss and often times feel like they've forgotten who I am haha.

Yay for blogging, I guess, is my point tonight.

And the Nutcracker countdown begins...

I'm back from another lonnnnng weekend of Nutcracker rehearsals in Connecticut. After one last midterm exam Saturday morning I hopped on the bus and was there all weekend til now. Luckily this weekend went much smoother than last weekend.

A new girl just joined the cast last week, so Saturday night we spent most of the time teaching the choreography to her. It was a good review for me because I'm still not completely comfortable in it. It's hard to only see something once a week and have no prep time before jumping right into it full out (not even a warm up or moment to mark through it!). So we worked until pretty late with that. It's hard because there's no set finish time for those rehearsals because those of us staying over from the city are literally living at the studio, so they can keep us working til all hours of the night if they wanted! They don't, but it's still hard to pace yourself when you don't know just how long you'll be working.

Anyway after rehearsal we finally had some time to ourselves so we go to go out to eat and one of the dancers that lives there gave us a mini tour of Hartford. It's such a cute little city - more like a suburb actually. The houses are beautiful and it was cool because many had Halloween (!) decorations out. It reminded me of my small town back home, and it was refreshing to get some air outside the city.

Then today it was back to rehearsal. We worked a lot on Snow today. I think that music might be my favorite part of Nutcracker. I remember back in the day in Boston I used to LOVE listening to that music backstage - and also from the orchestra pit the few years I got to be in the chorus because I was in Act II. That was quite the experience, seeing the snow scene from the conductor's perspective. That's the one thing I really do miss about home...Boston's Nutcracker. I grew up with it like I grew up with my family. That production will always be the first that comes to mind with that music, even though I've done many other versions since then.

Anyways - I'm rambling. Rehearsal went fairly well, and then our bus back left right on time for once. It's a nice treat to get home a decent hour on a Sunday night so I can prepare for the week.

Since last week was midterms and I did a ton of work and everything I gave myself the weekend off from homework. Usually I carry massive amounts of books with me on the bus, but this weekend I brought just one book to read for enjoyment. I haven't read for enjoyment (besides my weekly NY Magazine reading) in sooo long. All this school work takes over and I lose the time and energy to just sit and read. So I took Tony Bentley's biography, "Winter Season." She was a dancer in NYCB and it's all about her experiences with Balanchine and so forth.

I'm such a ballet dork reading ballet books, but 1) I like to hear different accounts of people in the ballet world who have worked with some of the teachers I know etc and 2) I hope to wite these kinds of books some day. So it's multipurpose, haha. But I finished the entire book this weekend and it was great. Highly recommended if you're a dance fan :)

Anyways I'm off to prepare for yet another busy week. I'm looking forward to Halloween class on Wednesday (hahaha..pictures to come). 3 days til that. 3 weekends til Thanksgiving. 3 months from yesterday I graduate!!!!!!!!!

Home, (Bitter)Sweet Home

(me and the family - brother, grandmother, mom)

This past week was literally my first time having more than two days off from life in exactly one year. Between rehearsals, extra school courses, internships, and everything I haven’t had a chance to breathe until now. To start of my 3 weeks of freedom I went home to Boston to visit my family whom I haven’t seen since Christmas (imagine, they’re only an hour flight away and I never see them!).

Since leaving home four years ago I’ve always missed everyone but dreaded making the trip to visit home. It’s just something about reverting back to the old ways…even for just a short period of time. Going from big city independence to small town boredom isn’t necessarily something to look forward to. There’s not much to do in our area, and since I don’t have my driver’s license (God bless public transportation) I can’t really be free.

However, this past visit was really nice. Unlike most visits, I had no looming pressure of school or performances ahead, so I didn’t feel like I was missing anything by taking time off. And being summertime, all of my family and friends had time to reminisce. We had a lot of laughs and it was a nice break.

(friends reminscing and dancing in my living room)

We celebrated my (belated) birthday, and I got to visit my mom’s new dance studio (it’s quite pink inside, like tradition…the last studio was pink for 50 years!). I got to see all my friends I grew up with and even relive some old dance routines (haha).

(me dancing in my mom's studio)

As I was growing up in my small town driving 2 hours a day to commute to ballet I always regretted not being born in a big city. Looking back, though, as a New York City resident (with high rent and hardly enough space to stretch out) I love that I have that alternative to look forward to for a change whenever I visit. No matter how far I go in this world, that place will always be my home.

(my mom and I)